I was completely bored, shifting restlessly in my seat from about 20 minutes in.

There’s no emotional depth to the characters and the happy little kingdom setting. They’re supposed to be who they are because that’s who they say they are.

The apple pie thing…

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seemed a bit Marie Antoinette “let them eat cake”

There’s no wordplay around “fair” having separate meanings of both “beautiful” and “just”, but both meanings are used in a jumble. As if the writers started to put some wordplay in, but abandoned the project halfway through.

The dwarves looked creepy, particularly Dopey who doesn’t look like the other dwarves at all, and also falls into that uncanny valley who is not quite unbelievable enough looking to avoid looking creepy, if that makes sense.

There is a cool subplot that I did like…

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…around Dopey being revealed as the narrator.

Gal Godot hamming it up as the Evil Queen didn’t quite work for me. Some actors just can’t do evil. A friend who watched this with me thought that she was okay though.

I did notice a long list of “greens” credits, i.e. plant handling. Maybe Disney should have spent some of that money on writers instead.