To be honest, it wasn’t until my late thirties that I finally mastered the crucial skill of identifying my own needs and transforming them into clear, appropriate communication. Before that breakthrough, I constantly defaulted to avoiding conflict—thinking “I shouldn’t bother anyone,” “I’m not entitled to make requests,” or “my primary role is ensuring everyone else’s happiness.” This self-effacing approach actually made me difficult to be around, as the unresolved internal conflict was painfully obvious to anyone with even minimal emotional intelligence. The irony is that in trying so hard not to inconvenience others, I created a more uncomfortable situation for everyone.